In the words of Theodore Roosevelt -"Nothing worth having comes easy".
I hope you're ready for some Curvy Amelia honesty overload because this my friends, is a cacophony of a blog post!
The truth is, I left this blog to the very last minute. I just didn't feel like writing it this week!
On Monday, life threw me one of those gorgeous hand balls and yelled 'OK Amelia! Get ready to catch this ginormous hunk of *insert choice of word here* while still juggling the 13 others you've already got up in the air...
Oh, and don't forget to smile at the same time!'
Haha....Thanks life. Your'e a real pal.
Although, that little episode left me in a miserable stink for a day or so, (not to mention, 'Aunt Flow' in her fabulously stylish vibrant crimson dress decided to pop round and say hello), my inner fashion psycho emerged and I decided I would gain back control in my life by going through my wardrobe...
The emotional rollercoaster that came next, was something I just HAD to share with you because I feel every woman has felt a similar way at some point in their lives!
Ok, let's be honest - 'Wardrobe Revivals' are what I am great at. I've been doing them for myself and my family since I was a little girl.
I would simply, re-evaluate the items I had in my cupboard and discard of the ones that weren't providing me with love and joy...simple pimple! *freakchild
Well, that wasn't the case the other day...I recently learned that I accumulated about 400 seperate items of clothing and have carried them around with me over the last 3 years to 3 different states.
So, I knew this one would be a doozy and it called for back up.
I did what any peed off woman on a rampage would do and asked my fashion gal pal for moral support and to help me w
ith those inevitable 'but I got this at a flea market in 2001 while whispering sweet nothing's in to my Iranian lover's ear' items..
Come on, we've all got them!
You can't escape my super Xray vision, peering in to your forbidden, emotional cotton forest...
Stage 1: Denial
Having placed all the items I hadn't worn in the last 6 months in a pile which creepily resembled something that was once hit by a car and left on the side of the road...I picked up a simple V neck grey jumper and with confusion said 'this is a perfectly good jumper, I don't even know why it's in this pile!
' BAM! There it was....the first point of denial.
When this happens, know that you're too far gone and your moral support HAS to step in and insist you try it on to remind yourself as to why you banished it to the dark side in the first place.
I sheepishly put it on over my lumpy, bumpy body and instantly realised the V neck was so high up my chest, it made my boobs look like a mangled slinky. *What was I thinking?!
Apart from that small detail, the ashy shade of grey made me look like a washed out old rag...not so sexy.
My friend bluntly asked me 'why did you hate yourself that day?!'...
They grey goose was quickly banished to the
'NEVER AGAIN - I WON'T EVEN DONATE THIS TO CHARITY' pile.
3. Just a Little Bit of Crazy
After another few moments of denial and hesitation, I found myself starting to really enjoying how freeing it was to 'let go of the old and make room for the new'!
I became weirdly happy and started bouncing around like a hyperactive 6 year old waiting for a ride at Luna Park.
I started grabbing things from all corners of my bedroom convincing myself I could buy everything new, start a new life and become a new human!!!!!!
My friend's blank expression said it all and I came to the conclusion that I may have reached a whole new level of crazy....
Stage 3: Time To Let Go
The time had come where I had to make the ultimate commitment and pack my unwanted and some just plainly inappropriate (yes, I'm talking to you, Supré mini skirt from spring 2003) in to a large duffel bag.
It felt as though I was parting with old manky friends whom had once been part of my identity and there was no going back. We said a few words and then dumped them in my favourite charity bin.
I realised there wasn't any use holding on to clothing that made me feel unhappy and although it can sometimes be a mission to strictly only buy clothes that make you feel absolutely fabulous in, it sure does save a lot of pain and angst for the future.
Even though my experience was quite...extreme...I still strongly encourage every woman to tackle their fear and fiercely attack their wardrobe with love and ambition because it really is an uplifting experience in the end.
All things are better with support so, invite your bestie over, pour yourselves a glass of bubbly and put on some killer music because girl, you CAN do it!